With my spiritual journey it feels similar to auditioning, even acting out parts in a play that happened in my life. The Gods that govern my life sit... watching me... waiting for my next move. Sometimes I do a little of this or a bit of that. Other times I feel their eyes piercing my soul, and keeping their gaze solely on me. I know I cannot hide from them because they still find me no matter what. The performance is a mess and completely scatter brained. There are abilities I know I can do. Then there are tasks I know I cannot do right away. It takes practice including better understanding of what needs to be done.
Visualization is hard for me to conquer when seeing myself draw on energy from specific sources. Visualization I can tell isn't my best suit. My spiritual dance I know isn't happening much. Physically I cannot dance worth a damn plus won't even try. Spirituality can be your best friend, later on will turn into the worst pain in your ass. Apparently there is some flow I have to keep with which some here and there told me. Only path I am taking is one I paved for myself. Never will I take a path someone else attempts in paving for me.
I see this performance has to continue. Even as I feel it breaking apart little by little. My Gods still watch me day and night. Waiting for my next move. I still see them there sitting. Still waiting, still watching, and being ever so patient. Why do a performance when I can write about it like this. Looks like I have no choice but to get through this spiritual performance to the best of my ability.
Visualization is hard for me to conquer when seeing myself draw on energy from specific sources. Visualization I can tell isn't my best suit. My spiritual dance I know isn't happening much. Physically I cannot dance worth a damn plus won't even try. Spirituality can be your best friend, later on will turn into the worst pain in your ass. Apparently there is some flow I have to keep with which some here and there told me. Only path I am taking is one I paved for myself. Never will I take a path someone else attempts in paving for me.
I see this performance has to continue. Even as I feel it breaking apart little by little. My Gods still watch me day and night. Waiting for my next move. I still see them there sitting. Still waiting, still watching, and being ever so patient. Why do a performance when I can write about it like this. Looks like I have no choice but to get through this spiritual performance to the best of my ability.
Good post. I just read your "About Me" section. LOL. You're funny and blunt like me.
ReplyDeleteI hope you have a good day, Nicole.